A few of my favorite things

It's springtime, not that you'd know it from the weather here. There was snow and freezing rain on Friday and I had to walk to work in it. On the bright side if I should have kids some day I can now say to them that when I was their age I had to walk nine miles in the snow and freezing rain to get to work. Of course, I'll have to wait until they are almost thirty for that to really be accurate.

Anyhow, it's springtime, which is one of my favorite things and in honor of it here is an excerpt from an episode of Sports Night (another one of my favorite things) about baseball (another one of my favorite things):

(Jeremy is by the food tables when Casey comes in)
Casey: Hey, Jeremy, you got a second?
Jeremy: You bet.
Casey: I looked over your Cubs/Marlins tape. (hands Jeremy the tape and goes to make a sandwich)
Jeremy: Yes?
Casey: And it's good.
Jeremy: Thank you.
Casey: It's very good.
Jeremy: Thanks.
Casey: Especially for your first time out.
Jeremy: Thank you very much.
Casey: I guess the one note I would have for you would be about length.
Jeremy: Yes?
Casey: Yeah. Usually we get thirty to forty seconds for each game. A little bit more if it's a game chock-full of spectacular plays and/or play-off consequences, and a little less if it goes the other way, but thirty to forty seconds is usually the rule of thumb.
Jeremy: I see. And how long did mine run?
Casey: Eight and a half minutes.
Jeremy: Ah.
Casey: Yeah.
Jeremy: That's long.
Casey: Yeah, it ran a little bit over, yeah.
Jeremy: I don't know what to do.
Casey: You should make it shorter.
Jeremy: I've tried everything.
Casey: You should try making it shorter.
Jeremy: What's the key?
Casey: In this case?
Jeremy: Yeah.
Casey: Making it a lot shorter.
Jeremy: I can't imagine what I'd cut.
Casey: Well, you start off with Cedric, the lead-off batter, in the top of the first inning.
Jeremy: Yes.
Casey: Despite the fact that nobody scored until the fifth inning.
Jeremy: There's action beyond scoring.
Casey: Yeah, but Cedric grounded out to the shortstop and was thrown out at first by quite a large margin.
Jeremy: Yeah.
Casey: Well, that is what is called a routine ground ball. In your search for things that are newsworthy, let the word "routine" serve as a danger sign.
Jeremy: There's nothing routine about it. Casey, the guy's hitting .327 since the All-Star break, he's drawn 22 walks in the lead-off position, and he's a threat to steal second every time you put him on. He fouled off seven pitches.
Casey: And you show each and every one of them.
Jeremy: You bet I do.
Casey: We usually just show the pitch that puts the ball into play.
Jeremy: But then you miss the battle.
Casey: The battle?
Jeremy: Yeah. He started him off with a fastball up and in. Then slider away, slider away, comes back with a split finger change, drops the curve off the table, sets him up off-speed, then jambs him high and tight. That's what got him out.
Casey: It was a ground ball to the shortstop.
Jeremy: The inevitable conclusion to a job well-done.
Casey: (frustrated sigh) We have fourteen baseball games to cover.
Jeremy: Yes.
Casey: Thirty seconds a piece.
Jeremy: Right.
Casey: Your tape is eight and a half minutes.
Jeremy: I'm at a loss.
Casey: You gotta make it shorter!
Jeremy: I'm just not seeing it.
Casey: (sigh) All right, come with me. Come on. (both leave)
(later)
(Casey and Jeremy stand in the editing room, looking tired and frustrated)
Casey: We've been at this for two hours now. Which is just slightly longer than your coverage of the seventh inning stretch.
Natalie: (taps on window) How's it going in there?
Casey: (sardonically) Goin' real good.
Jeremy: Casey and I are having some very healthy creative differences.
Natalie: Casey listens to the Starland Vocal Band, so I wouldn't take any stock in --
Casey: (marching up to window) Go away from me now!
Natalie: Shout if you need me --
Casey: Now! (Natalie runs off) Okay, this section here where the batter taps dirt off his shoe and spits four times?
Jeremy: We can't cut that!
Casey: Jeremy --
Jeremy: No, the storm clouds are gathering.
Casey: All right, just out of curiosity, what kind of voice over would you have me write for this moment?
Jeremy: What's wrong with "the storm clouds are gathering?"
Casey: The storm clouds aren't gathering, he's cleaning his shoe!
Jeremy: He's breaking Carrera's pitching rhythm.
Casey: (sighs)The battle?
Jeremy: The battle.
Casey: The battle. Okay, look --
Jeremy: If people just want the score they can listen to the radio. We have an opportunity to affect their appreciation of baseball.
Casey: (rubs temples and clasps hands as if in prayer) God knows you've affected mine.
Dana: (entering room) Casey, what are you working on?
Casey: An epic miniseries.
Jeremy: It's the Cubs/Marlins.
Dana: I gotta make room for Danny's apology. Just give me the double off the wall, the homer in the 5th and the error at third.
Jeremy: That's a travesty!
Dana: I need it in my hands right now. Casey, we're on the air in fifteen minutes.
Casey: All right. I gotta go change, Jeremy. The storm clouds are gathering. (leaves with Dana)